In the interest of conserving some of my upload capacity, I thought I might indulge in some text… try out my new desk and all that.
Much of what I’m doing now is workbench stuff, and kind of catching my breath from the first phase of the working, consolidating the gains as it were.
The fast remains easy enough. No jarring side effects. I’m concerned I might be overindulging in pureed fruits and veggies, and taking the edge off the fast, so I’m adjusting my intake accordingly. My need for sleep is minimal and my energy remains high.
The thrust of the weekend has been casting about for ways to go deeper, and along those lines, on saturday morning I consulted the thoth tarot, as it remains my favorite oracle by far.
I went for a fairly minimal three card layout, with the center card being the core idea of how to proceed, and the outer two modifying or commenting on that.
the prince of swords
a bit of commentary thus:
following this, I trekked out for a walk in the biting cold rain/snow to attend my martial arts class, which ended up being cancelled due to said weather ( the saturday class takes place outside right now but that’s going inside soon ) but I took the opportunity to plunge into some concentration practice as I walked, which I find I’m pretty good at, mostly aimed at exploring the themes of the divination and such. I find it’s mostly staying at the level of hypnotic type trance, giving some feeling of internal reorganisation. My overall feeling is that a lot of stuff needs to shift to get the contact I’m looking for and my experience so far confirms that. Building the landing strip as it were.
Saturday evening was spent exploring the idea of some kind of ritual vocal incantion to anchor the process, vis a vis something like the bornless ritual. Arrived at something preliminary but still find the language jarring and stilted. I have trouble thinking my daimon would use language like that or need to hear it. But something verbal and impassioned that appeals to the right brain would be a step in the right direction, indeed.
As promised I’ve drafted up a list of goals and whatnot for the working, to solidify the intent. It’s worth noting that much of what I specfied earlier has come to pass to a greater or lesser extent. Certainly there is much energy at my disposal right now, so a tighter focus is probably required to go further.
In any event the list is as follows;
( in no particular order as of yet )
1. Contact experience of the Augoeides/Daimon/HGA ( I will admit to a certain desire for fireworks. buddhism can be a bit drab. )
2.Break the deadlocked moribund routine of my practice ( I would consider this a done deal, even at this early stage)
3. Renew my sense of purpose ( also well along )
4. Clarify the long game ( ditto. more on this later )
5. Banishing and binding of personal demons ( again, ditto, as we’ve seen )
6. Definitive health fast ( certainly if I end up going three weeks or more, that will be a done deal )
7. Catalyse similar workings in others ( clearly there are at least three going on concurrent to mine, that I know of already, so there is sympathetic intent at the very least)
8. Arrive at the confidence and clarity to make siginificant life choices ( surely the banishing of my demonic critic and cynic will go a long ways in this direction)
I see it is snowing like a muthafucka outside, which is pretty rare for here, so I might take a hint from Mr Laboratarian and scourge myself at the hands of the elements.
So shall it be! Unto the end! Such are the words!